Goodbye

Saying goodbye is a very difficult thing to do. Especially when the goodbye is ending a long term relationship between friends but sometimes saying goodbye, regardless of how difficult, is the best thing for a person. I have known for many years that I needed to end this relationship but regardless of how non-functioning and codependent it has been, there was something that comforting to me about it.

So today I write yet another goodbye letter to you that  you will never see to try and help me finally keep my resolve to end what doesn’t work.

I’m not saying goodbye to the memories or lessons that our friendship provided for me but I’m saying goodbye to the things that didn’t work. I know that this goodbye will be equally beneficial to you as well.

I’m saying goodbye to the disrespect that came from both of us and for the lack of common curtesy that we had for each other.

I’m saying goodbye to how dependent I was on you and how dysfunctional I became when you were around.

I’m saying goodbye to the heartache we caused each other and the pain that came as a result of us trying to make this work between us and not succeeding.

I’m saying goodbye to the feelings of insecurity that I felt as a result of us being friends.

I’m saying goodbye the anxiety that my expectations of our relationship causes me.

I am saying goodbye to all the reason I couldn’t be my best self when I was with you.

I’m not “never” going to speak to you nor am I going to treat you badly when I see you. I’m just not going to hang out with you or expect you to want to be around me it’s clear that you don’t.

From now on we can just be friendly acquaintances

So Goodbye, I hope you feel as free and happy as I expect to feel now that it is over between us!