The last couple of days have been really hard for me. I feel like nobody really likes me. I went to the viewing of a friend who past away. We stood in line for almost 2 hrs when we finally got in we weren’t even able to talk to Ryan’s wife. A Lady that used to be in my ward whom I will refer to on here as A, came and talked to everyone she knew but she avoided us like the plague. I saw a friend there who promised to call but she didn’t keep her promise.

Sometimes I just don’t feel worthy of love and I wonder how it will be when I pass away; Will there be people on the other side who love me or will they all act like I don’t exist like A did? I have decided I am not going to the funeral tomorrow. This is the second funeral of someone I know in as many weeks. Usually people die in threes. I wish I could be the third.